December
The new Curate
of St Agatha’s, in Pepperstock Green, 35-year-old Derren Mcphail, had been
invited to have dinner at the home of a local bigwig, and he was muttering to
himself and shaking his head for virtually the whole of his walk, as he reran
an incident that happened earlier in the evening.
He was at the
home of the Church Warden Kevin Southey for a meeting about the beginning of
Advent, when he needed to pee, so he discreetly slipped away from the meeting
and went to use the down stairs bathroom and no sooner had he gone inside and
locked the door than he spotted a woman sitting on the toilet, with her tights
and underwear around her knees and her skirt hoisted up her thighs.
“I'm so sorry” he said in a fluster “I didn’t think, I am so, so sorry”
He was in such a state that he didn’t know where to look, but when he noticed
her smiling at him he got all flustered and turned to leave, but his hand was
shaking so much that he couldn’t unlock the door and then he heard her get up
and replace her clothing.
“It’s ok I’m
not angry” she said, and he turned around to face her.
“But I’m so
terribly sorry” he said, and she smiled at his discomfort, and he got all
flustered again and this time when he turned to unlock the door he succeeded
and returned to the meeting, just in time for the end, despite the fact he
still hadn’t peed.
But as he made
his way through the village all he could think of was the incident with the young and beautiful young woman with the dark skin and
bobbed brunette hair and dark, almost black eyes, and that glorious smile.
When he reached
the house, he knocked on the door and was greeted by Kevin Southey, who he had
met at the earlier meeting at his home.
“Hello Derren,
the lady of the House is in the lounge” he said and pointed the way
“Thanks Kevin”
He responded and then headed to the lounge as directed, and no sooner had he
gone inside and closed the door than he spotted the woman who’d been sitting on
the toilet at Kevin’s and she flashed him her glorious smile, a smile that
reached her dark, almost black eyes, sharp and intelligent, behind her gold
rimmed spectacles as they sat on her aquiline nose.
With her finely
chiseled features she was the beautiful side of attractive, and despite his
embarrassment from earlier he found himself drawn to her.
“Ah Derren this
is our hostess Chania Campbell”
“Chania, this
is our new Curate, Derren Mcphail”
“Hello Derren”
she said offering her hand “It’s nice to see you again so soon”
“Likewise,” he
said shaking her hand and he felt a tingle of electricity pass between them.
“Oh, I didn’t
realize you’d already met” Kevin said
“It was on a
brief hello” she said without elaboration
He knew that
she wasn’t at Kevin’s for the meeting, she was only there to go through the
Parish accounts, so he wasn’t quite sure how they’d met.
“Chania
Campbell?” he said, “the Children’s Writer.”
“Yes” she
replied
“I just bought
my niece “Wiccan Wendy” for Christmas” he said “She’s a big fan”
“She has
impeccable taste” she said with a laugh
“Now you must
excuse me while I check the food”
He was
considerably less embarrassed after having met, and been formally introduced to
her, especially as she was fully clothed, so he was able to relax and mingle
with the other guests.
In addition to
the hostess Chania, there was a skinny young woman of a similar age, Fiona
Phippen, an illustrator, who was an old school friend of the hostess, and she
also assisted in the kitchen, Chania’s brother Aiden, an artist, Kevin Southey,
Church Warden at St Agatha’s, Literary agents, Harry and Tracey Smedley,
Actresses Louise Sexton and Jade Edwards and Tim Weston who was a Local
Historian, so it was an interesting bunch.
When the time
came for them to take their seats he found that he was seated between the
Actress, Louise Sexton, and Chania, and as the actress seemed to be focusing
all her attention on the man across the table from her, Harry Smedley, he found
he spent most of the meal talking to his hostess.
She was a
delightful young woman, intelligent, witty and a very good cook, toboot, he
thought of her as a young woman but she was only younger than him by a year or
two.
“So tell me
about you niece?” she asked
“Mia is my
sister Liz’s daughter, 12 years old, incredibly bright, a voracious reader, and
she can twist me round her little finger” he said proudly “and as she is an
only child, I spoil her”
“Is she local?”
“Relatively,
they live in Pipershaven” he said “So I see them fairly regularly”
“And do you
have any other nephews and nieces?”
“No, just the
one” he replied
“What about
children of your own?” she asked
“No, sadly, but
then I am a Batchelor”
“So you’re not
the marrying kind eh?” she said and winked
“I wouldn’t say
that. I just haven’t met the right person yet” he replied
“Perhaps you’ve
been looking in the wrong places” she said and raised her eyebrows, in
reference to their first meeting and they both laughed.
Over coffee
Chania said
“As your niece
Mia is a fan, why don’t you pop round with the book some time and I’ll sign it
for you”
“That’s very
kind but I wouldn’t wish to presume on your good nature” he protested
“Nonsense, I
insist” she said and touched the back of his hand, and he felt that tingle of
electricity again and he could tell by her expression that she felt it
too.
“Thank you” he
said after she removed her hand
“That would be
great Kudos for me, she’ll think I’m the best Uncle in the World”
“I’m sure she
does already” she said and smiled and then people started getting up to leave
so he felt that he should too.
Chania was at
the front door saying goodbye to her guests and Derren was the last of them
“So, I know
you’re going to be busy for the next few days at St Agatha’s as it’s the first
Sunday of Advent, and then I’m in Abbottsford for a couple of days, seeing my
publisher among other things, so is Wednesday evening ok with you?”
“That would be
perfect” he said and shook her hand, “Good night”
“Good night,
Derren I’ll see you Wednesday”
Chania was
right about him being busy on Sunday, St Agatha’s was such a well-attended
Church that they ran three services, at his previous Parish they barely had
enough Parishioners to run one.
When he called
round to her house on Wednesday Evening he related his thoughts to her while
they sat in her lounge drinking coffee.
“So how did you
motivate yourself to so few, was it Matthew 18:20 “For where two or three
are gathered in my name, there am I among them”” she asked
“No, I used an
old joke that my Uncle Walter told me many years ago, he was also a clergyman,
and a very funny man” he said
“Well do tell”
she said in earnest
“Ok then” he
said “It was a bitterly cold and bleak Christmas morning and the snow had been
falling heavily for hours, and the Vicar stood at the door waiting to greet his
congregation, but none came, then just as he had decided to cancel the service,
one solitary parishioner arrived, a farmer named John, “Merry Christmas John”,
the Vicar said, but alas you’ve had a wasted journey because even though it’s
Christmas day I’ve decided there’s no point in having a service today”
“Well Vicar
when I go to the fields at feeding time and only one cow turns up, I still feed
it””
“That’s a great
analogy” Chania said and laughed delightfully
“Not as poetic
as Matthew but very funny”
“Now where’s
that book?” she asked and put a lap tray in place in preparation, and he gave
it to her and she opened the fly leaf and began to write and write.
“That’s a very
long inscription” he said
“Hush, I’m busy
giving you more kudos” she said and chuckled
“There” she
said offering the book to him, and snatching it back immediately
“No peeking
until she’s read it, promise”
“Promise” he
said, and she handed the book to him which he put straight in his bag.
When it was
time for him to leave, Chania took the cups to the kitchen while he slipped his
coat on and when she came back she said
“It’s
absolutely bucketing down out there”
“That’s ok I
don’t have far to go”
“I’ll drive you
in the car” she offered
“I’ll be fine
really”
“Nonsense
you’ll catch your death, and you’ve got a busy time ahead, you still have three
advent services, St Lucy’s Day, the Carol Concert, Christingle and then there’s
Christmas itself, so if you think I’m going to let you get soaked to the skin
you are very much mistaken” she said forcefully and found herself buttoning his
coat when she was finished “So we’ll go in the car”
“Ok then” he
conceded
As she walked
him to the front door he added
“I have to
confess I was surprised to find the Author of “Wiccan Wendy” was a Christian”
“Do you mean
because my heroine is a pagan?”
“Yes I suppose
so”
“Well first of
all despite her being a Wiccan she is also a force for good” she said
“And it’s very
difficult to completely separate paganism and Christianity, especially at this
time of year, Christmas itself takes place at the time of the old Roman
festival of Saturnalia”
“Well yes
that’s true” he agreed
“And the
bringing of evergreens into the home, a wreath on the door, holly boughs,
Christmas Trees and of course this…” she said pointing upwards to the mistletoe
hanging above them.
“Ah” he
exclaimed
“A very potent
pagan symbol” she said
“I don’t
suppose we could just ignore it” he enquired
“Not really”
“We could
pretend we haven’t seen it” he suggested
“I wouldn’t
recommend it” Chania said gravely
“You wouldn’t?”
“No, it might
anger the Gods”
“The pagan
Gods?”
“No, the
Christmas Gods” she said and kissed him, and it was a gentle tender kiss that
made his knees go weak.
“Oh my, that’s
very potent” Derren sighed
“Well, I think
that should appease the Gods” she said and opened the door “For now”
“Oh, I think
so” he agreed
When she pulled
up outside Caxton Court he was hoping for another taste of pagan potency, but
he was to be disappointed
“I’m off on my
travels again” she said “but I should be back on St Lucy’s Day”
“Ok, good night
then, and thanks for the lift”
“My pleasure,
good night, I hope to see you at the party” she said
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