Friday 17 November 2023

Uncanny Christmas Tales – (062) Yuletide Felicitations

 

Mornington-By-Mere is a small country village lying in the Finchbottom Vale nestled between the Ancient Dancingdean Forest and the rolling Pepperstock Hills.

It is a quaint picturesque village, a proper chocolate box picturesque idyll, with a Manor House, 12th Century Church, a Coaching Inn, Windmills, a Schoolhouse, a River, a Mere and an Old Forge, and Rob Hunter lived in the Old Forge with his wife Dorcas.

Rob arose very early on Sunday morning despite entertaining a very voracious and energetic Solicitor the day before, she slipped away well before first light having satisfied her insatiable appetite and left him sleeping.

The first thing he did was to breakfast in order to refuel after the previous evening’s excesses.

Next on the agenda was to strip the bed and launder the lust-stained bedding, and as he loaded the machine and set the program to wash his sins from the bed sheets, he harboured the futile wish that it could be that easy to wash his sins away.

I went upstairs and remade the bed with fresh linen in preparation of sullying them anew this time with his gorgeous wife Dorcas who he was picking up from Shallowfield Station after lunch.

His exceptionally early start to the day enabled him to complete all his chores with ease and after a long leisurely shower he left for church.

He would often lunch at the pub after church unfortunately he had to give it a miss as he was driving to pick up Dorcas that afternoon which he thought was a great shame.

Not the picking up his wife part, he meant it was a shame he was going to miss lunch with friends.

When he reached his front door, he found what was clearly a bottle of something in one of those decorative bottle bags, standing on the doorstep.

He picked it up and read the tag.

“Have a Merry Christmas, with love from a grateful patient”.

He smiled to himself because she wasn’t thanking him for his medical skills or bedside manner.

He went inside and made himself a rather boring sandwich and was just drying his hands after washing up his lunch plate when there was a knock at the door.

When he opened the door, he found Daisie Lewis on the other side of it, holding a Christmas parcel.

“Happy Christmas” she said with a beaming smile.

“Hey! Happy Christmas” he responded, “come in”.

“Ok” she said still smiling broadly “but no funny business”.

“No funny business” he agreed, and Daisie stepped inside

“You didn’t have to get me a gift,” he said to her as he took her coat, and she sat down on the sofa.

“Last Christmas my mum was drunk for ten days in a row, we had no decorations, no Christmas dinner, no electricity and no joy in my world”.

She said as tears were beginning to form in her eyes.

“This year, I have three jobs; I have a proper home, I have someone to mother me, I have money in the bank and a boyfriend and it’s all thanks to you”.

He tried to interrupt but Daisie continued

“If you hadn’t helped me, looked out for me, set me on the right path I wouldn’t be here now having the best Christmas I’ve ever had, I will always be grateful for that, and the other things of course” and she blushed.

The “other things” she was referring to would have been several sexual interludes that occurred between them, although that was not the reason, he helped her and he did not intend it to happen, but it happened, nonetheless.

Daisy stood up and gave him a big hug and an hour later she left his house considerably moister than when she had entered it.

“So much for no funny business,” he thought.

 

While he was showering for the second time that day, he thought how nice it was to get an early Christmas present and to give a gift to her as well.

If he got a present from every recipient of his lust, he would do very nicely and would need a considerably larger tree to put them under.

 

As a result of Daisie’s Yuletide felicitations, he was twenty minutes late leaving for the drive to Shallowfield.

He phoned to let Dorcas know he was running late, though not the reason, but she said that was ok as the train was running behind time anyway.

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