I DECIDED TO SPICE UP CHRISTMAS

 

I decided to spice up Christmas

And along with some scanties

I bought her some special toys

That cost me a fortune in batteries

FOR OUR CHRISTMAS DINNER

 

For our Christmas dinner

We had German sprouts

And they in no way allayed

Any low emission doubts

INSTEAD OF THE TRADITIONAL TURKEY

 

Instead of the traditional Turkey

We had Venison this year

While up at the North Pole

Santa was missing a Reindeer

WE HAD TO CUT THE LEGS OFF

 

We had to cut the legs off

The turkey to get it in the oven

But I think we should have

Killed it first on reflection

SHINY RED BAUBLES

 

Shiny red baubles

Can be a sign of the Season

But for my brother

An STD was the reason

AT CHRISTMAS WHEN I WAS A CHILD

 

At Christmas when I was a child

I always used to resent

Getting items of clothing

As they weren’t a proper present

 

But that all changed later

And I would always make a fuss

When I was in my teens

If I didn’t get clothes for Christmas

AS KIDS EVERY CHRISTMAS TIME

 

As kids every Christmas time

We would really go berserk

But now I’m grown up I think

It’s just a lot of extra work