Wednesday, 14 September 2022

PANTER CLAUS

 

We’ll have a quiet night in

So let the festivities begin

I think it really is a thriller

To have you as a stocking filler

Do you think it shocking?

To want you in my stocking

But I’ll fill you with joy

If you’ll be my sex toy

I can be your secret Santa

You can be my sultry panter

A bit of festive rough and tumble

Ok then just a quick fumble

I thought you’d be up for a goose

They all said you were loose

Then you’re not a sure thing?

And you don’t swing?

No please don’t go home yet

I’m the best offer you’ll get

Sod it another quiet night in

Let the celibacies begin

FLAWLESS

 

You are fat and round

And your trousers are tight

Your nose is quite red

And your beard is white

Now all of the above

Might be considered flaws

But they’re not to me

As you are my Santa Claus

THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE ROAD TO CHRISTMAS

 

After her flight is diverted due to bad weather high-powered fashion photographer Claire Jameson (Jennifer Grey) finds herself stranded in Middle America on the way to her dream Christmas Eve wedding in Aspen.

At the same time the rugged former artist turned teacher, Tom Pullman (Clark Gregg), and his 13-year old daughter Hilly (Megan Park) are on the road to spend Christmas with Grandma.

Claire is unable to get another flight or rent a car and is reduced to begging for a ride.

But Tom and Hilly are well into their road trip before they cross paths with Claire but when they do they kindly offer to take her to Aspen which isn’t far from their destination.

But as they got under way, none of them realized that as their journey was beginning it would lead them to a very different destination to the one they were expecting.

Tuesday, 13 September 2022

WHAT WOULD I WISH FOR?

 

If I had a Christmas wish

What would I wish for?

Well that’s a good question

I’m not really sure

I'd wish for peace in the world

Yes I think that would do

No I’m only kidding

I would wish for you

ELF PRINCESS

 

I will be your elf princess

And I will be forever yours

So put on the red suit

And be my Santa Claus

A WASTED WISH

 

Why would I make a Christmas Wish?

And hope that it would come true,

What on earth could I ever wish for?

That would be a tenth as good as you

THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ANGEL DOLLS

 

Angel Dolls is by far the best Christmas movie of the last 30 years.

It is possessed with all the usual ingredients for a seasonal film, romance, humour, schmaltz, pathos and a strong Christian message but this one has something else, a surprise ending.

And that’s not something that’s easy to pull off in a Christmas movie.

Lynn Brandt (Josie Bissett) is an abused wife who leaves her alcoholic husband Darryl (Russell Porter) on Thanksgiving and moves with her children Thomas (Rustin Gresiuk) and Sara (Farryn Van Humbeck) to another town.

A year later and Lynn is working hard but getting nowhere financially and has to tell her son Thomas that they can’t afford a tree, decorations or presents.

Thomas is already having problems of his own as he’s still the new boy at high school and is being regularly bullied.

Their lives slowly become entwined with another family in trouble Kevin Morrell (Matthew Settle) has a failing business and his wife Jenny (Kendra Anderson) is heavily pregnant.

Thomas and Kevin become friends on the basketball court at a church youth club while Jenny’s pregnancy takes a turn for the worst.

Lynn finds a solution for the lack of Christmas presents and signs up the children for the Paper Angels which allows those on low incomes to write their child’s name and the desired gifts on the back of a Paper Angel hanging on the Christmas Tree at the Mall.

The school bullying soon turns to cyber bullying when another student puts up a Facebook appeal to help a poor kid namely Thomas.

But after he is befriended by popular girl Cassie Bale (Anja Savcic), Thomas uses the cyber bullying to his own advantage and turns the Facebook campaign into a charity collection for the Salvation Army.

Predictably perhaps Kevin gets Thomas’s angel from the tree, but the gifts he asks for are far from predictable.