LAST CHRISTMAS

 

Last Christmas

We got the winter vomiting virus

It wasn’t nice

And it was shared by all of us

It was the worst

We didn’t see much Christmas cheer

I tell you one thing

We’ve just asked for money this year

 

THE CHRISTMAS ANGEL

 

The Christmas Angel comes each year

To spread around the Christmas cheer

Though the angels seldom appear

They are still there so do not fear

And listening with the keenest ear

You will never ever be able to hear

The Christmas angel standing near

But she will look over those near and dear

As she spreads around the Christmas cheer

Then the heavenly presence we revere

Twill be gone again until next year

RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER

Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer

Had a very shiny nose

And if you ever saw him

You would even say it glows

All of the other reindeer

Laugh and call him awful names

And they leave poor Rudolph

To play his little snorting games

So on every Christmas Eve

Santa’s heard to say: 

If you give up the cocaine

You might pull may sleigh again

 

But all the reindeer knew him

And his love for nose candy

Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer

Santa’s little coke junkie

THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ROAD TO CHRISTMAS (2018)

Maggie Baker (Jessy Schram) is a TV producer who is producing the Christmas Special for TV cook Julie Wise (Teryl Rothery) for the 5th year in a row.

But because the latest show is going out live the network bosses force her to co-producer with a former producer, one of Julie's sons, Danny (Chad Michael Murray).

Initially, she's not too happy about it but they come up with a plan to record Christmas segments for the show all across the country during which she gets to know Danny and meets his brothers David and Derek (Jeff Gonek and Cardi Wong) and because Christmas brings friends and families together she makes it her mission to reunite all three siblings with their mother for Christmas during the Christmas special.

SILENT NIGHT, HOLY NIGHT

Silent night, holy night

Such a sweet carol

Neither rousing nor stirring

But moving and inspiring

A carol to unite in adoration

A song to touch the soul

Poignant and joyous

Holy music at its most powerful

Simple and unpretentious

SANTA’S R & R

When Santa returns to the north pole

After his momentous Christmas eve

He is always looking forward

To his well deserved annual leave

 

His post Christmas R & R always begins

With a sight to make his passion burn

That of Mrs Claus festively clad

Hot and spicy to greet him on his return

 

In red stiletto shoes, red and white stockings

Standing seductively against the bedroom door

Then revealing her delights to her horny Santa

As her fur trimmed cloak falls to the floor

 

Red silk skimpies, a glimpse of her thighs

Santa is eager to quench his thirst

But Mrs Claus says heading towards the bed

“You had better warm your hands up first”

PARTY CLAUS

What does Santa do after Christmas?

Well if you want to know the truth

He parties hard with Mrs. Claus

Til they melt the snow off the roof