When a gingerbread man lays
On his bed Perchance
to sleep
He does so every
single night
Saturday, 4 March 2023
WHEN GINGERBREAD MEN SLEEP
Saturday, 25 February 2023
THREE MEN DIED ON CHRISTMAS EVE
Three men died on Christmas Eve
And were stood before St Peter
“You must all pass a simple test
Before you are allowed to enter”
“So produce a symbol of the season
Either on or about your person”
The first man retrieved a bauble
From his overcoat pocket
And St Peter turned to the gate
And proceeded to unlock it
St Peter said “You are blessed
Because you have passed the test”
The next man took a red bow
From his overcoat pocket
And St Peter turned to the gate
And proceeded to unlock it
St Peter said “You are blessed
Because you have passed the test”
The last man took a pair of panties
From his overcoat pocket
St Peter stood fast before the gate
And made no effort to unlock it
St Peter said “You are not blessed
Because you have failed the test”
“In what way do a pair of knickers
Symbolized the Christmas season
I fail to see how they are appropriate
So enlighten me as to the reason”
So the man proceeded to explain
“A young woman’s intimate apparels
Are without a doubt appropriate
When they happen to be carols”
IT WAS ANOTHER SUV CHRISTMAS
It was another SUV Christmas
Thanks to my significant other
No not that kind of SUV, I got
Socks, Underwear and Viagra
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 3
My worst Christmas present ever
Without a doubt, I have concluded
Was when I received a box of batteries
Labelled “toys not included”
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – A CHRISTMAS PIROUETTE (2020)
Former Olympic skating hopeful Courtney
Bennett (Abigail
Klein) runs the Worcester outdoor public skating oval in
the Common behind City Hall and teaches skating classes, when Mayor Greenwood (Will Lyman) announces it will be closing after Christmas.
Then she meets former NHL hockey player
Noah Tremblay (Ryan Cooper) who runs the new indoor skating centre
and his daughter Grace (Meara Mahoney-Gross) after Grace joins
Courtney's skating class.
But they come together to try to save the
public rink and the Christmas Carnival at the Oval and fall in love along the
way.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – NATIVITY ROCKS! THIS AIN'T NO SILENT NIGHT (2018)
Jerry Poppy (Simon Lipkin) journeys to St
Bernadette’s primary in Coventry in search of the brother he didn’t know he
had, Desmond, only to find out from the new headteacher, Mrs. Keen (Celia
Imrie), that he and his Aunt were in Australia.
His arrival coincides with the announcement
that the city is competing to be the city of Christmas by staging a rock opera,
to be directed by Emmanuel Cavendish (Craig Revel Horwood).
So Jerry joins teacher Ben Johnson (Daniel
Boy) to try and get the class an audition for the competition, while also
helping social worker (Helen George) try to reunite unattached refugee Doru
(Brian Alan Bartle) with his father (Ramin Karimloo) after Doru runs away from
his friend Barnaby’s (Rupert Turnbull) house.
So they must follow him to Much Wenlock
where they meet Farmer Beatie (Ruth Jones) and then they must all get back to Coventry in time for the concert.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS (1964)
Martian children have become obsessed with
television shows from Earth which are full of references, depictions, and
stories about Santa Claus.
So, an expedition is sent to Earth to
kidnap Santa from the North Pole, then the group of Martians take Santa Claus
and two children back to Mars with them because there is nobody on Mars to give
their children presents.
But Santa and the Earthling children soon
overcome the Martians by bringing fun, happiness, and Christmas cheer to the
children of Mars.
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