THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – SMALL TOWN SANTA
On the eve of Christmas, Rockford County Sheriff Rick Langston (Dean Cain) has lost his holiday spirit.
That isn’t helped when he catches a local man who had stolen the baby Jesus from a Nativity scene in order end up in a warm jail cell.
Later he finds a man at his home and Rick naturally assumes he has broken in even though he looks and acts a lot like Santa Claus.
But he arrests the jolly old man in the red suit anyway and places him in jail with the Nativity thief and then both he and Santa open the sheriff’s eyes to a few things.
Unexpectedly Sheriff Langston then meets a woman who has just moved to Rockford named Lucy Hart (Christine Lakin) and after meeting her and her daughter Alana (Sophie Bolen) he comes to realise that even when you feel that all is lost, love is all around you and that his life promises more than he could have hoped for and he had a renewed belief in the possibility of miracles.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – A FAIRYTALE CHRISTMAS
Appraiser/real estate saleswoman Isabella Everhart (Haylie Duff) is in partnership with her father Rex Everhart (C. Thomas Howell) but he’s not pulling his weight and not for the first time he drops a bombshell in her lap at the last minute, a large estate sale.
So still angry at her father she leave her California hometown in the rear-view mirror, Belle heads north on business to facilitate the estate sale of a mansion and she also put some distance between herself and her old school friend and persistent suitor Tony (Mark Famiglietti).
Despite her displeasure at being let down by her father the job is a dream, the client, Hunter Lowell (Nicholas Gonzalez), however is not, but, as the two spend more time together, his icy demeanour begins to melt.
Although their relationship is budding, Belle's long-time suitor, Tony, arrives, sending mixed signals to Hunter while adding chaos to the holiday season in a Yuletide romantic triangle.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE SANTA SUIT
Drake Hunter (Kevin Sorbo) is CEO of Hunter Toys, turned the company he inherited from his father, from a cosy quality manufacturer into a ruthless, uncaring, profit hungry business.
He employed all the production line staff on 39 hour weeks therefore avoiding the need to provide full benefits and he was no better during the holidays he showed his staff no festive generosity, no bonuses or time off.
However he gets the scrooge treatment when he meets who he presumes is one of the store Santa’s, Kris Krandall (Derry Robinson), who magically transforms Drake into a likeness of himself and as no one recognizes him as CEO he is forced to live in a shelter run by Nancy Baxter (Jodie Dowdall) and work as a Santa for Norm Dobson (Jason Blicker) in his toy store, with weird would be-actor Sebastian (Darrell Faria) as his Elf.
While working at the store he meets a quiet young girl called Gemma (Brianna Daguanno) and between his interaction with her and the kind and gentle influence of Nancy at the shelter he reassesses his values and priorities in life.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE SANTA INCIDENT
Santa (James Cosmo) has his sleigh shot down while flying through restricted military airspace and he is found unconscious on the railway tracks by two children Daniel (Scott Graham) and Sophia (Ali Lyons),
While lying in hospital in a coma one of the nurses looking after him is the children’s mother Joanna (Ione Skye), but the earthbound Santa is sought for questioning by a pair of overzealous Homeland Security agents.
As a result the fate of Christmas is in the hands of the disbelieving by-the-book duo of Agents, unless their faith in Santa can be restored by two children, their mother, the local sheriff (Jonathan Kerrigan) and a trio of elves who have arrived from the North to help out a friend in need.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – DECK THE HALLS (2011)
Based on the novel by Mary and Cathy Higgins Clark this breezy Christmas mystery thriller in which a female Detective Regan Reilly (Scottie Thompson) hooks up with a lottery winner-cleaning woman-turned amateur sleuth Alvirah Meehan (Kathy Najimy) to investigate the kidnapping of Regan's father Luke Reilly (David Selby) and a young female driver Rosita Alvarado (Luciana Carro) by a man in a Santa suit just before the holidays.
So in this fast moving seasonal thriller, the race is on to rescue the unfortunate pair from the out of character “Santa” kidnapper and get them home in time for Christmas.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – A SNOW GLOBE CHRISTMAS
Meg (Alicia Witt) is a cynical TV exec who thinks the shows she produces mislead people into thinking dreams really can come true.
She is also a terrible Scrooge like boss who uses and abuses her crew, but she meets her match when she encounters Sal (Christina Milian) but that was mainly because she was an Angel.
During a conversation between the two of them Meg tries to smash a snow globe which bounces up and hits her on the head and knocks her out.
When she wakes up she is in the perfect snow-covered town depicted in the snow globe and she has a husband, Ted (Donald Faison) and two children.
Unable to fit into the world that she finds herself in, despite the fact that everyone in town tries to accept her, her negative attitudes eventually impacts on the town folks.
But just as she starts to realize that she likes her snow globe life better than her real one, she returns to reality with another bonk on the head courtesy of Sal, but she is no longer the person she was.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE TWELVE TREES OF CHRISTMAS
The Twelve Trees of Christmas strongly echoes the rivalries of "You've Got Mail" or "Two Weeks’ Notice".
Cheri Jamison (Lindy Booth) works at the Shaughnessy Library in Manhattan and she finds out shortly before Christmas that the library is not to reopen after the holiday and is to be demolished to make way for luxury apartments.
She immediately rallies the residents of her beloved Manhattan neighbourhood to fight the closure but finds herself up against an ambitious developer Tony Shaughnessy (Robin Dunne).
Despite her efforts she is thwarted at every turn so decides to get all the patrons of the library to participate in a Christmas tree decorating contest to be judged on Christmas Eve by Rosaleen Shaughnessy (Dawn Greenhalgh).
The process of decorating the trees brings romance to some of the participants including despite their best efforts, Cheri and Tony.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT 2013
Charlotte Hart (Nicollette Sheridan), a distinguished journalist, has moved back to her home town and is living with her brother’s family.
However just before Christmas a real estate developer, Daniel Huntslar (Bart Johnson) approaches the small town with a very lucrative offer.
However Charlotte is sceptical and as she’s a journalist her nose tells her there’s a real scoop, so she drives to see the real estate company boss to question him, however while en route she has a terrible car accident and wakes up in the hospital only to realize that her body is in a coma, but her spirit is very much awake.
She then meets another spirit who just happens to be the greedy developer who was the driver of the other car involved in the crash and he too is in a coma.
In the five days before the big vote on the proposed development Charlotte must try to change the minds of the town’s people as well as her fellow spirit.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ONCE UPON A HOLIDAY
Katherine (Briana Evigan) is a Royal Princess and is in New York just before Christmas for a series of official engagements.
But she just wants an hour to herself out of her busy schedule to visit an art exhibition.
But when her Aunt Margaret (Jacqueline Samuda), who runs her life, tells her it was not possible and to stop being selfish she escapes her entourage to explore New York anyway and as she is tired of her diamond-studded and privileged life and the royal responsibilities that went along with being a royal princess she decided to take longer than an hour.
But when a pair of street hustlers steal her purse and prised camera, a good Samaritan, a young man called Jack (Paul Campbell) comes to her aid and ends up sweeping her off of her feet when he shows her his side of the city.
And when her true identity is finally revealed it is Jack who arranges for her to view the exhibition unheeded after calling in a favour.
It’s a lovely film in which, Harry (Jay Brazeau) steals the show as Jack’s friend, in this gentle heart-warming Christmas tale.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – A CHRISTMAS PROMISE
Michael Thompson (Patrick Muldoon) is an uptight city accountant who is struggling to raise his teenage daughter Chloe (Mandalynn Carlson) all on his own after his wife’s tragic death.
Being a single parent and having to work long hours Chloe doesn’t see as much of him as she would like which leads to her attention seeking behaviour, so when he gets a call from Cliff Harrison (Rick Herod) to help save their family stables before ruthless bankers shut them down, he wonders if the country life is just what he and Chloe need to start over.
However when Michael arrives to sort out a farm’s financial problems he finds that Cliff's daughter Samantha (Charisma Carpenter) is not as appreciative of his help as rest of the family (Sydney (Dominique Swain), Jackson (Jaren Lewison), and Ben (Billy Tilk)) are for his help.
But as they search for ways to save the family's legacy, Romance develops between the accountant and Samantha while the baddies in the story seem hell bent on acquiring the farms best horse called Holly which is prised by the family as it was Cliff’s deceased wife’s favourite.
Wednesday 28 December 2016
Christmas Poem Selection # 16
ARE YOU WEARING A PAPER HAT?
Are you wearing a paper hat?
It’s Christmas day and that’s that
We’ve pulled our Christmas crackers
So everyone must wears a paper hat
MY VERY WORST CHRISTMAS EVER
My very worst Christmas ever
Was when I got an empty carton
All dog-eared and flattened out
For hours of innocent ex-box fun
CRIMBLETIDE
I really love Crimbletide
It makes me all warm inside
And the joy I cannot hide
For the season of Crimbletide
TO ALL OF YOU, FROM ALL OF US
I have to say
Without ado
It’s time to say
To all of you
From all of us
Merry Christmas
PERSISTENT AND DISRUPTIVE WINDS
Persistent and disruptive winds,
There seems to be no doubts,
Are predicted after Christmas
And it will probably be the Sprouts
A VEGETARIAN CHRISTMAS
Do you want to celebrate?
A vegetarian Christmas
Then here you are
Have a freshly strained
Vegetable every day
With the advent colander
THE COUNCIL CHRISTMAS TREE
The council Christmas tree is dressed
And the lights were switched on in June
But don’t get yourself unduly distressed
With energy saving lights it’s not too soon
Because you must switch them on remember
So they are warmed up by December
THE WEATHER MAY BE DREARY
The weather may be dreary
My bones maybe weary
I may walk with heavy step
I may be lacking in pep
But when Christmas arrives
My spirit soon revives
IT LIFTS THE HEART AND SOUL
It lifts the heart and soul
Even when doing chores
What the yearlong drains
The festive season restores
THROUGHOUT THE YULETIDE SEASON
Throughout the yuletide season
In the light of the fireside glow
Christmas garlands are strung
Of Holly, Ivy and Mistletoe
BALTHAZAR, MELCHIOR AND CASPAR
Balthazar, Melchior and Caspar
The wise men of the east
Search for the prince of peace
Gods dove against the beast
And with the holy birth
The light of love was released
CHRISTMAS IS A SPECIAL TIME
Christmas is a special time
When wishes can come true
But if you find they don’t
You can still make believe
That she is in love with you
SEASONS COME AND GO
Seasons come and go, but
For me the festive season
Is the most special of all
It refreshes and restores
Simply put, it invigorates
And sets me up once again
For the coming year ahead
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 2
My worst Christmas present ever
Was when I got an empty carton
All dog-eared and flattened out
Really tatty and really not fun
When I complained to my dad
And declared it worse than socks
He said I should be more grateful
To receive my very own ex-box
To make things so much worse
My dad thought it was quite nifty
If you then spun the box around
To make an ex-box 360
WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES
When the clock strikes
The midnight hour
One year ends
And another begins
With an explosion
Of pyrotechnic splendour
Lavishly ostentatious
Many thousands of pounds
Up in smoke
Is it really worth it?
Would it not be better spent?
On the homeless
And the lost
And so begin a new year
With new hope
Are you wearing a paper hat?
It’s Christmas day and that’s that
We’ve pulled our Christmas crackers
So everyone must wears a paper hat
MY VERY WORST CHRISTMAS EVER
My very worst Christmas ever
Was when I got an empty carton
All dog-eared and flattened out
For hours of innocent ex-box fun
CRIMBLETIDE
I really love Crimbletide
It makes me all warm inside
And the joy I cannot hide
For the season of Crimbletide
TO ALL OF YOU, FROM ALL OF US
I have to say
Without ado
It’s time to say
To all of you
From all of us
Merry Christmas
PERSISTENT AND DISRUPTIVE WINDS
Persistent and disruptive winds,
There seems to be no doubts,
Are predicted after Christmas
And it will probably be the Sprouts
A VEGETARIAN CHRISTMAS
Do you want to celebrate?
A vegetarian Christmas
Then here you are
Have a freshly strained
Vegetable every day
With the advent colander
THE COUNCIL CHRISTMAS TREE
The council Christmas tree is dressed
And the lights were switched on in June
But don’t get yourself unduly distressed
With energy saving lights it’s not too soon
Because you must switch them on remember
So they are warmed up by December
THE WEATHER MAY BE DREARY
The weather may be dreary
My bones maybe weary
I may walk with heavy step
I may be lacking in pep
But when Christmas arrives
My spirit soon revives
IT LIFTS THE HEART AND SOUL
It lifts the heart and soul
Even when doing chores
What the yearlong drains
The festive season restores
THROUGHOUT THE YULETIDE SEASON
Throughout the yuletide season
In the light of the fireside glow
Christmas garlands are strung
Of Holly, Ivy and Mistletoe
BALTHAZAR, MELCHIOR AND CASPAR
Balthazar, Melchior and Caspar
The wise men of the east
Search for the prince of peace
Gods dove against the beast
And with the holy birth
The light of love was released
CHRISTMAS IS A SPECIAL TIME
Christmas is a special time
When wishes can come true
But if you find they don’t
You can still make believe
That she is in love with you
SEASONS COME AND GO
Seasons come and go, but
For me the festive season
Is the most special of all
It refreshes and restores
Simply put, it invigorates
And sets me up once again
For the coming year ahead
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 2
My worst Christmas present ever
Was when I got an empty carton
All dog-eared and flattened out
Really tatty and really not fun
When I complained to my dad
And declared it worse than socks
He said I should be more grateful
To receive my very own ex-box
To make things so much worse
My dad thought it was quite nifty
If you then spun the box around
To make an ex-box 360
WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES
When the clock strikes
The midnight hour
One year ends
And another begins
With an explosion
Of pyrotechnic splendour
Lavishly ostentatious
Many thousands of pounds
Up in smoke
Is it really worth it?
Would it not be better spent?
On the homeless
And the lost
And so begin a new year
With new hope
Tuesday 27 December 2016
Christmas Poem Selection # 15
ARE YOU WEARING A CHRISTMAS OUTFIT?
Are you wearing a Christmas outfit?
Well you really do look good in it
And it doesn’t look risqué, not a bit
It’s a really cracking little outfit
Though all the emphasis is on the fit
IT’S NOT EVERYONE’S IDEAL
It’s not everyone’s ideal
Not their cup of tea
Or glass of mulled wine
But it is for me
Christmas is special
A wonderful heartfelt time
When deep felt feelings
Of happiness and joy
Rise to the surface
Like bubbles in champagne
THE WARM GLOW
In the warm glow
Of the log fire blazing
The fresh trimmed tree
Just looks amazing
As we sit together
In the quiet glow
I yearn to say
How much I love you so
The depth of my love
Is truly amazing
And just one coy glance
Sets my passions blazing
So on Christmas Eve
In the quiet glow
I think it’s time
For you to know
Just how much
I love you so
ADIOS FRIEND
My Christmas wish for you,
My friend is a simple one
Have a happy time in the cold
I’m jetting off to the sun
THE QUEEN’S SPEECH
We listen at 3pm on Christmas day
To hear what the Queen has to say
While for those of a Republican bent
An alternative is just a click away
SOAP TRADITION
Christmas is all about traditions
But they evolve across the years
Some fall from favour all together
Then new ones seem to appear
This is certainly the case
Of one of the more recent traditions
To the familiar Christmas fare
The TV soaps festive additions
This is when the tired old plot line
That’s simmered away since June
Suddenly explodes in your face
And not a moment too soon
A QUIET MAGIC DESCENDS
Oh how a quiet magic descends
Upon the streets on Christmas day
As it’s the one day of the year
The shops are closed all day
CHRISTMAS DAY FOR THE POOR
Christmas day for the poor,
Hold very little surprise
For them it’s just another day
In a sparkling disguise
CHRISTMAS IS OUR FAVOURITE CELEBRATION
Christmas is our favourite celebration
In fact it is the most special occasion
A time to express what is in our hearts
The moment the festive season starts
For we have the most heartfelt wish
For those whose love we truly cherish.
IT’S SUCH A MILD CHRISTMAS
It’s such a mild Christmas
All the birds are singing noisily
Normally in December
They’re all frozen to a tree
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 1
My worst Christmas present ever
I thought I would be lucky to receive
It was big and so full of possibilities
But it really flattered to deceive
Beneath the coloured paper
That hinted at hidden promise
It turned out to be a cardboard box
Containing only emptiness
My mum was watching me intently
And my disappointment hurt her
My cheapskate dad then told me
It was an Action Man deserter
ARE YOU SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER?
Are you Santa’s little helper?
Well you’re a proper little belter
I love the little pixie boots
And the red velvet dress really suits
The Santa hat looks very smart
The stripy stockings stir the heart
And I’d like to see your garters
But give me a kiss for starters
CANDY CANES, CINNAMON AND GINGER
Candy Canes,
Cinnamon and Ginger
Are some of my favourite
Christmas things
Especially when
They’re only wearing
Christmas Stockings
And Popcorn Strings
A SNOWMANS TALE
When I was very little
My dad and his brother
Built a huge snowman
Bigger than any other
He was as tall as Dad
And was round and fat
It had coal for eyes
And a big black hat
A scarf about its neck
For sartorial style
A large carrot nose
And a twig for a smile
Knobbly stick arms
With gloves at the end
A belt around its girth
Like a cummerbund
I loved that snowman
Standing so very tall
Until the eventual thaw
And I watched him fall
MY BROTHER WAS FIVE YEARS MY SENIOR
My brother was five years my senior
So he always led me astray
He took me on a hunt every December
Leading up to Christmas day
To find the presents that mum and dad
Had cunningly stashed away
Are you wearing a Christmas outfit?
Well you really do look good in it
And it doesn’t look risqué, not a bit
It’s a really cracking little outfit
Though all the emphasis is on the fit
IT’S NOT EVERYONE’S IDEAL
It’s not everyone’s ideal
Not their cup of tea
Or glass of mulled wine
But it is for me
Christmas is special
A wonderful heartfelt time
When deep felt feelings
Of happiness and joy
Rise to the surface
Like bubbles in champagne
THE WARM GLOW
In the warm glow
Of the log fire blazing
The fresh trimmed tree
Just looks amazing
As we sit together
In the quiet glow
I yearn to say
How much I love you so
The depth of my love
Is truly amazing
And just one coy glance
Sets my passions blazing
So on Christmas Eve
In the quiet glow
I think it’s time
For you to know
Just how much
I love you so
ADIOS FRIEND
My Christmas wish for you,
My friend is a simple one
Have a happy time in the cold
I’m jetting off to the sun
THE QUEEN’S SPEECH
We listen at 3pm on Christmas day
To hear what the Queen has to say
While for those of a Republican bent
An alternative is just a click away
SOAP TRADITION
Christmas is all about traditions
But they evolve across the years
Some fall from favour all together
Then new ones seem to appear
This is certainly the case
Of one of the more recent traditions
To the familiar Christmas fare
The TV soaps festive additions
This is when the tired old plot line
That’s simmered away since June
Suddenly explodes in your face
And not a moment too soon
A QUIET MAGIC DESCENDS
Oh how a quiet magic descends
Upon the streets on Christmas day
As it’s the one day of the year
The shops are closed all day
CHRISTMAS DAY FOR THE POOR
Christmas day for the poor,
Hold very little surprise
For them it’s just another day
In a sparkling disguise
CHRISTMAS IS OUR FAVOURITE CELEBRATION
Christmas is our favourite celebration
In fact it is the most special occasion
A time to express what is in our hearts
The moment the festive season starts
For we have the most heartfelt wish
For those whose love we truly cherish.
IT’S SUCH A MILD CHRISTMAS
It’s such a mild Christmas
All the birds are singing noisily
Normally in December
They’re all frozen to a tree
MY WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER # 1
My worst Christmas present ever
I thought I would be lucky to receive
It was big and so full of possibilities
But it really flattered to deceive
Beneath the coloured paper
That hinted at hidden promise
It turned out to be a cardboard box
Containing only emptiness
My mum was watching me intently
And my disappointment hurt her
My cheapskate dad then told me
It was an Action Man deserter
ARE YOU SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER?
Are you Santa’s little helper?
Well you’re a proper little belter
I love the little pixie boots
And the red velvet dress really suits
The Santa hat looks very smart
The stripy stockings stir the heart
And I’d like to see your garters
But give me a kiss for starters
CANDY CANES, CINNAMON AND GINGER
Candy Canes,
Cinnamon and Ginger
Are some of my favourite
Christmas things
Especially when
They’re only wearing
Christmas Stockings
And Popcorn Strings
A SNOWMANS TALE
When I was very little
My dad and his brother
Built a huge snowman
Bigger than any other
He was as tall as Dad
And was round and fat
It had coal for eyes
And a big black hat
A scarf about its neck
For sartorial style
A large carrot nose
And a twig for a smile
Knobbly stick arms
With gloves at the end
A belt around its girth
Like a cummerbund
I loved that snowman
Standing so very tall
Until the eventual thaw
And I watched him fall
MY BROTHER WAS FIVE YEARS MY SENIOR
My brother was five years my senior
So he always led me astray
He took me on a hunt every December
Leading up to Christmas day
To find the presents that mum and dad
Had cunningly stashed away
Monday 26 December 2016
Have yourself a very naughty Christmas # 5
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS KNICKERS?
Are you wearing Christmas Knickers?
Is that appropriate for vicars?
Just kneel upon this hassock
While I rummage in your cassock
The bishop wouldn’t think it funny
My naughty little Christmas honey
SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN
You better watch out
You better not cry
Better not pout
I'm telling you why
Because Daddy
Has just worked
A 14 hour day
And now has to drive
300 miles of Christmas traffic
To spend another bloody Christmas
At Grandma Browns
House of doom
So he is not in the mood
For any of your shit
CHRISTMAS TURKEY
Laid naked on the kitchen table
White flesh from leg to breast
A Christmas bird to be enjoyed
My table was truly blessed
I set about the job in hand
Getting the bird prepared
And by using all my expertise
No effort at all was spared
Having greased the old bird well
The meaty legs spread wide
And I began to stuff the bird
I was really in my stride
When the bird had been well stuffed
It lay resting on the cooker
Smelling of sage and onion
The bird really was a looker
Then I looked up at the kitchen clock
Panic filled me and I began to fret
I shouted to my wife “quick put you pants on”
Ii haven’t prepared the turkey yet
SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER
I’ve bought a special gift
For my Christmas honey
It’s a “Santa’s little helper” outfit
And it’s bloody horny
Its red velour with white fur trim
And matching lingerie
It’s figure hugging short and tight
And shows all you’d want to see
I’ve always liked sexy outfits
And this is the best I’ve seen
I’m sure that she will like it
Especially as it wipes clean
CHRISTMAS GOOSE
At Christmas time
I do like a goose
It is my one weakness
And I offer no excuse
Though it does depend
Of course on the bird
To say any different
Would be quite absurd
The quality of goose
That you are executing
Is directly related
To the bird you are goosing
EVERYONE IN THE GROTTO KNOWS
Everyone in the grotto knows
The reason for Santa’s ho ho ho’s
And why Santa’s little helper is all aglow
Because she is the latest of Santa’s ho’s
In her green woolly panty hoes
Pixie shoes with turned up toes
Her outfit held together with velcro
Everyone in the grotto knows
Santa gets inside her pixie clothes
And fills her stocking, ho ho ho
SANTA’S R & R
When Santa returns to the north pole
After his momentous Christmas eve
He is always looking forward
To his well deserved annual leave
His post Christmas R & R always begins
With a sight to make his passion burn
That of Mrs Claus festively clad
Hot and spicy to greet him on his return
In red stiletto shoes, red and white stockings
Standing seductively against the bedroom door
Then revealing her delights to her horny Santa
As her fur trimmed cloak falls to the floor
Red silk skimpies, a glimpse of her thighs
Santa is eager to quench his thirst
But Mrs Claus says heading towards the bed
“You had better warm your hands up first”
PARTY CLAUS
What does Santa do after Christmas?
Well if you want to know the truth
He parties hard with Mrs. Claus
Til they melt the snow off the roof
FATHER AND CHRISTMAS
What do a Christmas tree
And a priest have in comparison?
The answer is simple to see
Their balls are just for decoration
EMPTYING SANTA’S SACK
One Christmas Eve on a roof top up on high
A poor soul stands shouting up at the sky
He has lost his job and his wife has left him
And the size of his overdraft is quite grim
Finishing his rant to god he shuts his eyes
Then he leaves a note saying his good-byes
He walks up to the edge ready to jump off
He stops when behind him he hears a cough
Father Christmas asks him "are you ok?"
And the man tells him the details of his day
He again walks to the edge of the rooftop
Then Father Christmas shouts, "please stop!"
“It’s Christmas so I’ll give three gifts to you
And I will have a small task for you to do”
Santa Claus says, “let me help you please”
The poor man is in such despair so he agrees
"That would be wonderful thanks,” he said
Father Christmas told him what was ahead
Firstly go home to your wife who is there
Waiting dressed in her sexiest underwear
Longing for you and begging forgiveness
She wants only you and your fond caress
And as for the recent loss of her affection
She will have absolutely no recollection
Secondly go into work after the holiday
Sit at your desk and work the same way
Your salary will have been well increased
Nobody remembers your employment ceased
Thirdly when you check your bank account
And you will be in credit by a large amount
The man is thrilled "oh thank you, thank you!"
Then said, “what is it that you want me to do?"
“Drop your trousers and then bend down”
The man is unsure agrees but wears a frown
Santa Claus gave him a brutal buggering
Leaving the poor man with eyes watering
Afterwards Santa asked, “how old are you?”
The man replied “actually I’m forty two”
“Your too old to believe in me by quite a bit”
Said the fat gay bastard in the Santa outfit
A HAND FOR SANTA
On Christmas Eve
Don’t lay awake in bed
All you naughty girls
Blonde, brunette or red
For instead of presents
You may get a shock instead
You may catch Santa
Dressed in his suit of red
Emptying his sack
At the end of your bed
CHIMNEY NOOK
The next time you complain
At the lack of Christmas nookey
Spare a thought for old St Nick
And have a little sympathy
For he only comes but once a year
And then he’s up a chimney
A CHRISTMAS WISH
On a Christmas Eve at midnight
When I got into bed
I lay upon my pillow
And there beside my head
Was Santa with his trousers off
And this is what he said
Happy Christmas little girl
I’ve unwrapped this gift for you
So take this gift with pleasure
To make your wish come true
Because Santa comes but once a year
And tonight he comes with you
SNOW SHOW
A weather man predicted snow
But he didn’t get it right
So the female anchor on the show
Asked to our delight
"So Bob, where's that 8 inches!
You promised me last night?"
ARE YOU WEARING XMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Xmas tights?
Oh how they are exciting me
Adorned with a festive motif
What a Christmas this will be
Are you wearing Christmas Knickers?
Is that appropriate for vicars?
Just kneel upon this hassock
While I rummage in your cassock
The bishop wouldn’t think it funny
My naughty little Christmas honey
SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN
You better watch out
You better not cry
Better not pout
I'm telling you why
Because Daddy
Has just worked
A 14 hour day
And now has to drive
300 miles of Christmas traffic
To spend another bloody Christmas
At Grandma Browns
House of doom
So he is not in the mood
For any of your shit
CHRISTMAS TURKEY
Laid naked on the kitchen table
White flesh from leg to breast
A Christmas bird to be enjoyed
My table was truly blessed
I set about the job in hand
Getting the bird prepared
And by using all my expertise
No effort at all was spared
Having greased the old bird well
The meaty legs spread wide
And I began to stuff the bird
I was really in my stride
When the bird had been well stuffed
It lay resting on the cooker
Smelling of sage and onion
The bird really was a looker
Then I looked up at the kitchen clock
Panic filled me and I began to fret
I shouted to my wife “quick put you pants on”
Ii haven’t prepared the turkey yet
SANTA’S LITTLE HELPER
I’ve bought a special gift
For my Christmas honey
It’s a “Santa’s little helper” outfit
And it’s bloody horny
Its red velour with white fur trim
And matching lingerie
It’s figure hugging short and tight
And shows all you’d want to see
I’ve always liked sexy outfits
And this is the best I’ve seen
I’m sure that she will like it
Especially as it wipes clean
CHRISTMAS GOOSE
At Christmas time
I do like a goose
It is my one weakness
And I offer no excuse
Though it does depend
Of course on the bird
To say any different
Would be quite absurd
The quality of goose
That you are executing
Is directly related
To the bird you are goosing
EVERYONE IN THE GROTTO KNOWS
Everyone in the grotto knows
The reason for Santa’s ho ho ho’s
And why Santa’s little helper is all aglow
Because she is the latest of Santa’s ho’s
In her green woolly panty hoes
Pixie shoes with turned up toes
Her outfit held together with velcro
Everyone in the grotto knows
Santa gets inside her pixie clothes
And fills her stocking, ho ho ho
SANTA’S R & R
When Santa returns to the north pole
After his momentous Christmas eve
He is always looking forward
To his well deserved annual leave
His post Christmas R & R always begins
With a sight to make his passion burn
That of Mrs Claus festively clad
Hot and spicy to greet him on his return
In red stiletto shoes, red and white stockings
Standing seductively against the bedroom door
Then revealing her delights to her horny Santa
As her fur trimmed cloak falls to the floor
Red silk skimpies, a glimpse of her thighs
Santa is eager to quench his thirst
But Mrs Claus says heading towards the bed
“You had better warm your hands up first”
PARTY CLAUS
What does Santa do after Christmas?
Well if you want to know the truth
He parties hard with Mrs. Claus
Til they melt the snow off the roof
FATHER AND CHRISTMAS
What do a Christmas tree
And a priest have in comparison?
The answer is simple to see
Their balls are just for decoration
EMPTYING SANTA’S SACK
One Christmas Eve on a roof top up on high
A poor soul stands shouting up at the sky
He has lost his job and his wife has left him
And the size of his overdraft is quite grim
Finishing his rant to god he shuts his eyes
Then he leaves a note saying his good-byes
He walks up to the edge ready to jump off
He stops when behind him he hears a cough
Father Christmas asks him "are you ok?"
And the man tells him the details of his day
He again walks to the edge of the rooftop
Then Father Christmas shouts, "please stop!"
“It’s Christmas so I’ll give three gifts to you
And I will have a small task for you to do”
Santa Claus says, “let me help you please”
The poor man is in such despair so he agrees
"That would be wonderful thanks,” he said
Father Christmas told him what was ahead
Firstly go home to your wife who is there
Waiting dressed in her sexiest underwear
Longing for you and begging forgiveness
She wants only you and your fond caress
And as for the recent loss of her affection
She will have absolutely no recollection
Secondly go into work after the holiday
Sit at your desk and work the same way
Your salary will have been well increased
Nobody remembers your employment ceased
Thirdly when you check your bank account
And you will be in credit by a large amount
The man is thrilled "oh thank you, thank you!"
Then said, “what is it that you want me to do?"
“Drop your trousers and then bend down”
The man is unsure agrees but wears a frown
Santa Claus gave him a brutal buggering
Leaving the poor man with eyes watering
Afterwards Santa asked, “how old are you?”
The man replied “actually I’m forty two”
“Your too old to believe in me by quite a bit”
Said the fat gay bastard in the Santa outfit
A HAND FOR SANTA
On Christmas Eve
Don’t lay awake in bed
All you naughty girls
Blonde, brunette or red
For instead of presents
You may get a shock instead
You may catch Santa
Dressed in his suit of red
Emptying his sack
At the end of your bed
CHIMNEY NOOK
The next time you complain
At the lack of Christmas nookey
Spare a thought for old St Nick
And have a little sympathy
For he only comes but once a year
And then he’s up a chimney
A CHRISTMAS WISH
On a Christmas Eve at midnight
When I got into bed
I lay upon my pillow
And there beside my head
Was Santa with his trousers off
And this is what he said
Happy Christmas little girl
I’ve unwrapped this gift for you
So take this gift with pleasure
To make your wish come true
Because Santa comes but once a year
And tonight he comes with you
SNOW SHOW
A weather man predicted snow
But he didn’t get it right
So the female anchor on the show
Asked to our delight
"So Bob, where's that 8 inches!
You promised me last night?"
ARE YOU WEARING XMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Xmas tights?
Oh how they are exciting me
Adorned with a festive motif
What a Christmas this will be
Christmas Poem Selection # 14
ARE YOU WEARING ELFIN EARS?
Are you wearing elfin ears?
They go with your elfin features
Let’s go and play in dingely dell
With all the woodland creatures
ELF PRINCESS
I will be your elf princess
And I will be forever yours
So put on the red suit
And be my Santa Claus
WHAT WOULD I WISH FOR?
If I had a Christmas wish
What would I wish for?
Well that’s a good question
I’m not really sure
I'd wish for peace in the world
Yes I think that would do
No I’m only kidding
I would wish for you
FLAWLESS
You are fat and round
And your trousers are tight
Your nose is quite red
And your beard is white
Now all of the above
Might be considered flaws
But they’re not to me
As you are my Santa Claus
PANTER CLAUS
We’ll have a quiet night in
So let the festivities begin
I think it really is a thriller
To have you as a stocking filler
Do you think it shocking?
To want you in my stocking
But I’ll fill you with joy
If you’ll be my sex toy
I can be your secret Santa
You can be my sultry panter
A bit of festive rough and tumble
Ok then just a quick fumble
I thought you’d be up for a goose
They all said you were loose
Then you’re not a sure thing?
And you don’t swing?
No please don’t go home yet
I’m the best offer you’ll get
Sod it another quiet night in
Let the celibacies begin
THE FESTIVE INTERVAL
When celebrating
The festive interval
Please refrain from calling it
The winterval
SCROOGE LIKE
They say the perfect Christmas
Is blessed with family and friends
I say the fewer the better
Otherwise the present buying never ends
A SIMPLE GIFT
I’m hoping that this Christmas
I will get what I desire
I’m not that easy to please
I don’t ridiculously aspire
I don’t want the moon and stars
Or diamonds or pearls
Some perfume or cosmetics will do
I’m not one of those greedy girls
I just want something for me
Just a small thing, for me this year
But as always it will be something
For the house from IKEA
SHOPS IN THE HIGH STREET
Shops in the high street
Are full to overflowing
With irate customers
Franticly to-ing and fro-ing
The shopkeeper delights
While prices are rocketing
Happy in the knowledge
Of the profits he’s pocketing
And in his smug contentment
He rubs his hands with glee
“Merry Christmas you mugs
And a prosperous new year, for me”
RUSH AND SCURRY
Hurry, hurry shopping in Surrey
Hurry, hurry, rush and scurry
Worry, worry, fresh snow flurry
Hurry Murray rush and scurry
Let’s get home and have a curry
CHRISTMAS EVE AT THE HOSTELRY
The local hostelries are full
As they approach the brink
And raise their glasses high
For yet another festive drink
The season roundly toasted
Measured by each glasses chink
The next morning’s celebration
Will be a silent one I think
ARE YOU WEARING IT FOR A REASON?
Are you wearing it for a reason?
Is it because of the festive season?
You won’t be kissed under the mistletoe
Because you’re wearing it too low
IF YOU PUT CANDY CANES ON THE TREE
If you put Candy canes on the tree
And Popcorn on strings
Then let me give the kind of advice
That experience brings
Don’t pack them away after the
Bell of New Year rings
Otherwise next year they will be
Seriously unsavory things
IN THE CHRISTMAS VILLAGE
In the Christmas village
At the North Pole
There is much excitement
Being kept under control
As there is to be an election
For every Elf and Troll
Votes can of course be cast
At the North Poll
WE ALL PLAYED CHARADES
We all played Charades
At the in laws on Boxing Day
My wife’s Uncle Jack
Really went for it I must say
We were really impressed
By his energetic display
It was ten minutes before we knew
His heart had given way
Are you wearing elfin ears?
They go with your elfin features
Let’s go and play in dingely dell
With all the woodland creatures
ELF PRINCESS
I will be your elf princess
And I will be forever yours
So put on the red suit
And be my Santa Claus
WHAT WOULD I WISH FOR?
If I had a Christmas wish
What would I wish for?
Well that’s a good question
I’m not really sure
I'd wish for peace in the world
Yes I think that would do
No I’m only kidding
I would wish for you
FLAWLESS
You are fat and round
And your trousers are tight
Your nose is quite red
And your beard is white
Now all of the above
Might be considered flaws
But they’re not to me
As you are my Santa Claus
PANTER CLAUS
We’ll have a quiet night in
So let the festivities begin
I think it really is a thriller
To have you as a stocking filler
Do you think it shocking?
To want you in my stocking
But I’ll fill you with joy
If you’ll be my sex toy
I can be your secret Santa
You can be my sultry panter
A bit of festive rough and tumble
Ok then just a quick fumble
I thought you’d be up for a goose
They all said you were loose
Then you’re not a sure thing?
And you don’t swing?
No please don’t go home yet
I’m the best offer you’ll get
Sod it another quiet night in
Let the celibacies begin
THE FESTIVE INTERVAL
When celebrating
The festive interval
Please refrain from calling it
The winterval
SCROOGE LIKE
They say the perfect Christmas
Is blessed with family and friends
I say the fewer the better
Otherwise the present buying never ends
A SIMPLE GIFT
I’m hoping that this Christmas
I will get what I desire
I’m not that easy to please
I don’t ridiculously aspire
I don’t want the moon and stars
Or diamonds or pearls
Some perfume or cosmetics will do
I’m not one of those greedy girls
I just want something for me
Just a small thing, for me this year
But as always it will be something
For the house from IKEA
SHOPS IN THE HIGH STREET
Shops in the high street
Are full to overflowing
With irate customers
Franticly to-ing and fro-ing
The shopkeeper delights
While prices are rocketing
Happy in the knowledge
Of the profits he’s pocketing
And in his smug contentment
He rubs his hands with glee
“Merry Christmas you mugs
And a prosperous new year, for me”
RUSH AND SCURRY
Hurry, hurry shopping in Surrey
Hurry, hurry, rush and scurry
Worry, worry, fresh snow flurry
Hurry Murray rush and scurry
Let’s get home and have a curry
CHRISTMAS EVE AT THE HOSTELRY
The local hostelries are full
As they approach the brink
And raise their glasses high
For yet another festive drink
The season roundly toasted
Measured by each glasses chink
The next morning’s celebration
Will be a silent one I think
ARE YOU WEARING IT FOR A REASON?
Are you wearing it for a reason?
Is it because of the festive season?
You won’t be kissed under the mistletoe
Because you’re wearing it too low
IF YOU PUT CANDY CANES ON THE TREE
If you put Candy canes on the tree
And Popcorn on strings
Then let me give the kind of advice
That experience brings
Don’t pack them away after the
Bell of New Year rings
Otherwise next year they will be
Seriously unsavory things
IN THE CHRISTMAS VILLAGE
In the Christmas village
At the North Pole
There is much excitement
Being kept under control
As there is to be an election
For every Elf and Troll
Votes can of course be cast
At the North Poll
WE ALL PLAYED CHARADES
We all played Charades
At the in laws on Boxing Day
My wife’s Uncle Jack
Really went for it I must say
We were really impressed
By his energetic display
It was ten minutes before we knew
His heart had given way
Sunday 25 December 2016
Have yourself a very naughty Christmas # 4
BAD SANTA # 4
Bad Santa is a bit of a perve
And his special seasonal wish
Is for you to jingle his bells
So you get a White Christmas
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS SOCKS?
Are you wearing Christmas socks?
Beneath your skirt it’s hard to see
And gives me pause to think
How high they go above the knee
THE OFFICE CHRISTMAS PARTY
All year long I fancied Lucy
But she turned out to be fickle
So I thought I’d drown my sorrows
And have a few festive tipples
But I ended up in a cupboard
With a girl with hairy nipples
FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS
Amidst the preparations
For the up coming festivities
There has been a lot of demand
On the Church amenities
For those of us involved
In pulling the Christmas peel
Found the time to practise
Was far less than ideal
I found it difficult to fit it in
Around work and family needs
And often practised alone
At a very late hour indeed
One night it all got too much
The final straw I can’t remember
But as a result I decided to tie
The bell rope around my member
I don’t know why it was
That I succumbed to the pressure
But I was discovered
And I was tolled off by the vicar
RUDOLPH THE RAMPANT
Rudolph has been grounded
And severely reprimanded
The cause is his nocturnal activity
During the season of the nativity
Donner has been knocked up
And Vixen is a favourite tup
There are many more names
Who’ve played his reindeer games
He is insatiable, even the boys
Have fallen victim of his joys
Now Santa has had enough
Since he mounted Billy Goat Gruff
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS # 9
Twas the night before Christmas and at the North Pole
Some of the elves will be signing on the dole
There was a bit of a cock up with the naughty and nice list
When the elves in dispatch all got totally pissed
RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER
Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer
Had a very shiny nose
And if you ever saw him
You would even say it glows
All of the other reindeer
Laugh and call him awful names
And they leave poor Rudolph
To play his little snorting games
So on every Christmas Eve
Santa’s heard to say:
If you give up the cocaine
You might pull may sleigh again
But all the reindeer knew him
And his love for nose candy
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer
Santa’s little coke junkie
MY EVERGREENS
Oh Holly and my Ivy
Of all the girls I’ve known
When they dress in the Santa gear
They really ring my bell
CHRISTMAS SPICE
Christmas time is very nice
But if I might offer some advice
You can add a spot of yuletide spice
If you indulge in a little festive vice
TIED UP WITH TINSEL
Have a little yuletide fun
Make it deliciously sinful
With your little Christmas hon
Tied up with tinsel
I SAW A FIGURE ON THE STAIR
I saw a figure
On the stair
Wearing red velvet
Trimmed with fur
It was Santa Claus
In my view
With long white beard
And hat askew
But not a Santa
Of familiar build
And no sack was apparent
Generously filled
I thought the figure
To my surprise
Was rather pleasing
To the eyes
And curiously aroused
At the view
Of Santa
In red stiletto shoes
At that moment
At the top of the stair
The coat fell open
And I do declare
This sight of Santa
Left me aghast
Wearing black stockings
And leather Basque
The white beard
Fell to the floor
And then I understood
What I saw
Santa hadn’t brought me
A gift in a sack
Santa was the present
For me to unwrap
FAIRY ON THE TREE
Fairy, fairy on the tree
Why do you look so glum?
Is it the Christmas Blues?
To which you have succumbed
Is that what makes you sad
Or the needles up your bum
HAVE A CRACKING CHRISTMAS
I must definitely make sure
Her Christmas sack is full
Then if your dear is happy
Your cracker might get a pull
SANTA AND ELFIE
Santa and Elfie
Were caught in the buff
At it in the grotto,
Santa and his bit of stuff
The store manager
Decided to get tough
And sacked them
Saying enough was enough
Now Santa’s not jolly
In fact he’s quite gruff
As Santa’s little helper
Is now up the duff
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Christmas tights?
Adorned with a festive motif
Well if those long festive limbs
Decorated with Christmas motif
Were to entwine about me
Then my resistant would be brief
Bad Santa is a bit of a perve
And his special seasonal wish
Is for you to jingle his bells
So you get a White Christmas
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS SOCKS?
Are you wearing Christmas socks?
Beneath your skirt it’s hard to see
And gives me pause to think
How high they go above the knee
THE OFFICE CHRISTMAS PARTY
All year long I fancied Lucy
But she turned out to be fickle
So I thought I’d drown my sorrows
And have a few festive tipples
But I ended up in a cupboard
With a girl with hairy nipples
FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS
Amidst the preparations
For the up coming festivities
There has been a lot of demand
On the Church amenities
For those of us involved
In pulling the Christmas peel
Found the time to practise
Was far less than ideal
I found it difficult to fit it in
Around work and family needs
And often practised alone
At a very late hour indeed
One night it all got too much
The final straw I can’t remember
But as a result I decided to tie
The bell rope around my member
I don’t know why it was
That I succumbed to the pressure
But I was discovered
And I was tolled off by the vicar
RUDOLPH THE RAMPANT
Rudolph has been grounded
And severely reprimanded
The cause is his nocturnal activity
During the season of the nativity
Donner has been knocked up
And Vixen is a favourite tup
There are many more names
Who’ve played his reindeer games
He is insatiable, even the boys
Have fallen victim of his joys
Now Santa has had enough
Since he mounted Billy Goat Gruff
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS # 9
Twas the night before Christmas and at the North Pole
Some of the elves will be signing on the dole
There was a bit of a cock up with the naughty and nice list
When the elves in dispatch all got totally pissed
RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER
Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer
Had a very shiny nose
And if you ever saw him
You would even say it glows
All of the other reindeer
Laugh and call him awful names
And they leave poor Rudolph
To play his little snorting games
So on every Christmas Eve
Santa’s heard to say:
If you give up the cocaine
You might pull may sleigh again
But all the reindeer knew him
And his love for nose candy
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer
Santa’s little coke junkie
MY EVERGREENS
Oh Holly and my Ivy
Of all the girls I’ve known
When they dress in the Santa gear
They really ring my bell
CHRISTMAS SPICE
Christmas time is very nice
But if I might offer some advice
You can add a spot of yuletide spice
If you indulge in a little festive vice
TIED UP WITH TINSEL
Have a little yuletide fun
Make it deliciously sinful
With your little Christmas hon
Tied up with tinsel
I SAW A FIGURE ON THE STAIR
I saw a figure
On the stair
Wearing red velvet
Trimmed with fur
It was Santa Claus
In my view
With long white beard
And hat askew
But not a Santa
Of familiar build
And no sack was apparent
Generously filled
I thought the figure
To my surprise
Was rather pleasing
To the eyes
And curiously aroused
At the view
Of Santa
In red stiletto shoes
At that moment
At the top of the stair
The coat fell open
And I do declare
This sight of Santa
Left me aghast
Wearing black stockings
And leather Basque
The white beard
Fell to the floor
And then I understood
What I saw
Santa hadn’t brought me
A gift in a sack
Santa was the present
For me to unwrap
FAIRY ON THE TREE
Fairy, fairy on the tree
Why do you look so glum?
Is it the Christmas Blues?
To which you have succumbed
Is that what makes you sad
Or the needles up your bum
HAVE A CRACKING CHRISTMAS
I must definitely make sure
Her Christmas sack is full
Then if your dear is happy
Your cracker might get a pull
SANTA AND ELFIE
Santa and Elfie
Were caught in the buff
At it in the grotto,
Santa and his bit of stuff
The store manager
Decided to get tough
And sacked them
Saying enough was enough
Now Santa’s not jolly
In fact he’s quite gruff
As Santa’s little helper
Is now up the duff
ARE YOU WEARING CHRISTMAS TIGHTS?
Are you wearing Christmas tights?
Adorned with a festive motif
Well if those long festive limbs
Decorated with Christmas motif
Were to entwine about me
Then my resistant would be brief
Christmas Movie Reviews # 7
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – SECRET SANTA 2001
10-year-old, Jackson Mayhew (Rory Culkin) moves in with his Aunt (Sherilyn Fenn) after the death of his parents.
Aunt Patty works the bar at the Coconut Grotto hotel in Florida and it’s at the Hotel where Jackson befriends an elderly man Sam Clausner (Hume Cronyn) and he begins to suspect that the old man is actually Santa Claus,
The wonderful Hume Cronyn's is brilliant and plays his role with panache and it will be remembered as a holiday classic.
His flawless performance was given despite the fact he was almost 90 years old.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE CHRISTMAS MIRACLE 2009
Ashley Matthews (Kari Hawker-Diaz) has been on her own all her life but she feels even more alone when it gets close to Christmas as she searches fruitlessly for a job and the endless Christmas cheer around her only rubs salt in the wounds as she scrimps and scrapes by to support herself and her dog, Dash.
However help is at hand from her neighbour, Nick Anderson (Bruce Davison), who knows exactly what to do to help and he offers her a job.
He asks her to be his assistant in what turns out to be a philanthropic endeavour, however there’s one catch she can't tell anyone that her new boss is a kind of Secret Santa, and she must help people anonymously.
Through her new job, Ashley meets Will (K.C. Clyde), a writer for a business magazine who uncovers what Ashley is doing, and more importantly, Nick's involvement in the acts of kindness.
As Ashley and Nick help people in need, she tries to protect Nick's secret, and her own heart, while Will must weigh the consequences of what might happen if he exposes them.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE THREE GIFTS
Jack Green (Dean Cain) inherited a southern Californian horse ranch from his father complete with an all-natural toy factory in the barn. Along with his wife Cherie (Jean Louisa Kelly) he is bullied into taking in the three “holy terrors” from orphanage run by his bossy aunt Rita (Mimi Kennedy).
It's only for a few weeks while renovations are done which would be completed before the holidays.
Mike (Dylan Sprayberry) and his buddies, Henry (Alex Zubarev) and Ray (Spencer Bridges), prove to be a handful, but Jack proves that he has father-potential and he and Cherie like having them around.
The trio go on their best behaviour after overhearing the couple are considering adopting just one of them, but that means they have to become rivals in order to be the one that’s chosen, resulting in trouble for everyone and fun for the viewer.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – LOST AT CHRISTMAS
This film is based on a true story about an estranged couple who find themselves lost in the Idaho wilderness after in impromptu snowmobile outing.
It was just before Christmas and when the weather turns they are trapped in a blizzard and the snowfall is so great all the trails are hidden.
Lost and alone Suzanne and Jim Shemwell (Jami Gertz and Dylan Walsh) are forced to confront the reasons why they separated.
Meanwhile their family, when they are not looking for Suzanne and Jim, are looking inward at themselves and re-evaluate their lives and their relationships.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS 2013
After being told by her boss that the company needs to attract more clients, Elizabeth (Melissa Sagemiller), a skilled executive, is also told she is to get unwanted help in the form of Robert (Brad Rowe), to grow the business.
Through the help of one of Santa’s helpers, Calvin the Elf (Martin Klebba), she is blessed with an extraordinary gift when she obtains a piece of jewellery that allows her to hear everyone’s unspoken thoughts.
It was intended to make her become more self-aware in order to find personal and professional fulfilment but she uses it as a tool to gain new clients and get one up on Robert.
However having first used her new-found power to get ahead at work, she soon learns to become a better person, and turns an office rivalry into romance while learning the true meaning of Christmas.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER –
COME DANCE WITH ME
Jack (Andrew McCarthy) is an executive in a financial brokerage firm and seems to have it all.
He is a rising star in line for a big promotion and has already impressed the boss, Drew Clayton (Chris Gillett), He is also dating the boss’s daughter’ the beautiful and elegant Demi Clayton (Stephanie Mills).
Jack plans to propose to Demi at her father's lavish annual Christmas Dance but in order to create the perfect impression on the night he signs up for ballroom dance lessons.
Which is when he meets dance instructor, Christine (Michelle Nolden), and the story really begins.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ALL I WANT IS CHRISTMAS
Ira J. Finkelstein (Elijah Nelson) is a Christmas obsessed Jewish boy.
He's seen every Christmas movie ever made and his dreams are filled with reindeer, sleigh rides and of course, snow.
The problem is, apart from the fact that Ira is Jewish is that at 11 years of age he feels that Christmas is passing him by and When Ira's hopes for a holiday vacation in Aspen are dashed, he hatches a plan to finally get the Christmas of his dreams.
When flying unaccompanied to visit his grandparents in sunny Florida, he swaps tickets with Mikey Amato (Justin Thomas Howell), another 11-year-old also flying unaccompanied on his way to Christmastown, WA.
But they not only trade airline tickets but places as well and Ira gets more than he bargained for when he experiences his first "White Christmas".
Elliott Gould and David DeLuise also star in this pleasant Christmas caper.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – HELP FOR THE HOLIDAYS
Although she loves Christmas, Christine (Summer Glau), who is an elf from Santa's village, wonders if there could be more to life than making toys at the North Pole.
So when Santa receives an emergency wish from a little boy in Los Angeles, he puts Christine on a special assignment in the real world and sends her to L.A. to help the VanCamp family.
Sara Vancamp (Eva LaRue) is a busy mom with absolutely no Christmas spirit and her husband Scott (Dan Gauthier), is little better.
So Christine is to look after the two Vancamp kids, Ally (Izabela Vidovic) and Will (Mason Cook) and give the whole family a Christmas wake-up call.
It is not altogether plain sailing and the question of whether Christine will fail her assignment and be sent back to the North Pole for good, or the VanCamps will come to their senses about the meaning of Christmas is unclear, but it’s fun watching the tale unfold.
The romantic interest is provided by Sara’s brother Dave Gabriel (John Brotherton) and Steve Larkin puts in a wonderful portrayal of Santa.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS 1991
Ethan (Ethan Embry), is the practical older brother, and adorable Hallie (Thora Birch) knows how to charm her way out any given situation, and they are both intent on spending Christmas with their parents, Catherine (Harley Jane Kozak) and Michael (Jamey Sheridan), and grandmother, Lillian (Lauren Bacall).
Despite the fact that their parents are divorced and Catherine is about to marry Tony Boer (Kevin Nealon)
So when Hallie goes to visit Santa Claus, she asks for the unusual gift of getting her parents back together.
Ethan and Hallie embark on their adventure and almost nothing goes exactly as planned partly because Ethan is preoccupied not only with his parents' romantic dilemma but also his first teenage crush, Stephanie (Amy Oberer).
This Christmas comedy is a hilarious caper to ensure everyone lives happily ever after scheme to get what they most want for Christmas.
So in the end does Catherine decide to reject Tony and remarry Michael or do the children fail.
Watch it and see.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THIS CHRISTMAS
This Christmas, is a holiday drama centred on the Whitfield family's first Christmas together in four years.
In Los Angeles, Shirley Ann Whitfield (Loretta Devine), affectionately known as Ma'Dere, is the matriarch of the Whitfield family.
Her six children are scattered far and wide, wife and mother Lisa (Regina King) lives in San Francisco and feels the need to take on the responsibility to manage her extended family's welfare.
Traveling jazz musician Quentin Jr (Idris Elba), who has been absent from the family for four years, and Claude (Columbus Short) is a marine.
In New York ad exec Kelli and (Sharon Leal) is the self-confessed selfish one, Mel (Lauren London) is a college student and Michael (Chris Brown) still lives at home while figuring out what he wants to do with his life.
Ma'Dere has lived in the family home for a few years now with Joe Black (Delroy Lindo), a church deacon, with Ma'Dere's husband/the children's father, Quentin Whitfield Sr., long having left the family to pursue a life as a jazz musician.
Each person present in Ma'Dere's house at Christmas is dealing with an issue in his/her life, some known by the family and some not but they all have an effect on the family dynamic associated with how “This Christmas” will turn out for them as a collective family.
10-year-old, Jackson Mayhew (Rory Culkin) moves in with his Aunt (Sherilyn Fenn) after the death of his parents.
Aunt Patty works the bar at the Coconut Grotto hotel in Florida and it’s at the Hotel where Jackson befriends an elderly man Sam Clausner (Hume Cronyn) and he begins to suspect that the old man is actually Santa Claus,
The wonderful Hume Cronyn's is brilliant and plays his role with panache and it will be remembered as a holiday classic.
His flawless performance was given despite the fact he was almost 90 years old.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE CHRISTMAS MIRACLE 2009
Ashley Matthews (Kari Hawker-Diaz) has been on her own all her life but she feels even more alone when it gets close to Christmas as she searches fruitlessly for a job and the endless Christmas cheer around her only rubs salt in the wounds as she scrimps and scrapes by to support herself and her dog, Dash.
However help is at hand from her neighbour, Nick Anderson (Bruce Davison), who knows exactly what to do to help and he offers her a job.
He asks her to be his assistant in what turns out to be a philanthropic endeavour, however there’s one catch she can't tell anyone that her new boss is a kind of Secret Santa, and she must help people anonymously.
Through her new job, Ashley meets Will (K.C. Clyde), a writer for a business magazine who uncovers what Ashley is doing, and more importantly, Nick's involvement in the acts of kindness.
As Ashley and Nick help people in need, she tries to protect Nick's secret, and her own heart, while Will must weigh the consequences of what might happen if he exposes them.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THE THREE GIFTS
Jack Green (Dean Cain) inherited a southern Californian horse ranch from his father complete with an all-natural toy factory in the barn. Along with his wife Cherie (Jean Louisa Kelly) he is bullied into taking in the three “holy terrors” from orphanage run by his bossy aunt Rita (Mimi Kennedy).
It's only for a few weeks while renovations are done which would be completed before the holidays.
Mike (Dylan Sprayberry) and his buddies, Henry (Alex Zubarev) and Ray (Spencer Bridges), prove to be a handful, but Jack proves that he has father-potential and he and Cherie like having them around.
The trio go on their best behaviour after overhearing the couple are considering adopting just one of them, but that means they have to become rivals in order to be the one that’s chosen, resulting in trouble for everyone and fun for the viewer.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – LOST AT CHRISTMAS
This film is based on a true story about an estranged couple who find themselves lost in the Idaho wilderness after in impromptu snowmobile outing.
It was just before Christmas and when the weather turns they are trapped in a blizzard and the snowfall is so great all the trails are hidden.
Lost and alone Suzanne and Jim Shemwell (Jami Gertz and Dylan Walsh) are forced to confront the reasons why they separated.
Meanwhile their family, when they are not looking for Suzanne and Jim, are looking inward at themselves and re-evaluate their lives and their relationships.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS 2013
After being told by her boss that the company needs to attract more clients, Elizabeth (Melissa Sagemiller), a skilled executive, is also told she is to get unwanted help in the form of Robert (Brad Rowe), to grow the business.
Through the help of one of Santa’s helpers, Calvin the Elf (Martin Klebba), she is blessed with an extraordinary gift when she obtains a piece of jewellery that allows her to hear everyone’s unspoken thoughts.
It was intended to make her become more self-aware in order to find personal and professional fulfilment but she uses it as a tool to gain new clients and get one up on Robert.
However having first used her new-found power to get ahead at work, she soon learns to become a better person, and turns an office rivalry into romance while learning the true meaning of Christmas.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER –
COME DANCE WITH ME
Jack (Andrew McCarthy) is an executive in a financial brokerage firm and seems to have it all.
He is a rising star in line for a big promotion and has already impressed the boss, Drew Clayton (Chris Gillett), He is also dating the boss’s daughter’ the beautiful and elegant Demi Clayton (Stephanie Mills).
Jack plans to propose to Demi at her father's lavish annual Christmas Dance but in order to create the perfect impression on the night he signs up for ballroom dance lessons.
Which is when he meets dance instructor, Christine (Michelle Nolden), and the story really begins.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ALL I WANT IS CHRISTMAS
Ira J. Finkelstein (Elijah Nelson) is a Christmas obsessed Jewish boy.
He's seen every Christmas movie ever made and his dreams are filled with reindeer, sleigh rides and of course, snow.
The problem is, apart from the fact that Ira is Jewish is that at 11 years of age he feels that Christmas is passing him by and When Ira's hopes for a holiday vacation in Aspen are dashed, he hatches a plan to finally get the Christmas of his dreams.
When flying unaccompanied to visit his grandparents in sunny Florida, he swaps tickets with Mikey Amato (Justin Thomas Howell), another 11-year-old also flying unaccompanied on his way to Christmastown, WA.
But they not only trade airline tickets but places as well and Ira gets more than he bargained for when he experiences his first "White Christmas".
Elliott Gould and David DeLuise also star in this pleasant Christmas caper.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – HELP FOR THE HOLIDAYS
Although she loves Christmas, Christine (Summer Glau), who is an elf from Santa's village, wonders if there could be more to life than making toys at the North Pole.
So when Santa receives an emergency wish from a little boy in Los Angeles, he puts Christine on a special assignment in the real world and sends her to L.A. to help the VanCamp family.
Sara Vancamp (Eva LaRue) is a busy mom with absolutely no Christmas spirit and her husband Scott (Dan Gauthier), is little better.
So Christine is to look after the two Vancamp kids, Ally (Izabela Vidovic) and Will (Mason Cook) and give the whole family a Christmas wake-up call.
It is not altogether plain sailing and the question of whether Christine will fail her assignment and be sent back to the North Pole for good, or the VanCamps will come to their senses about the meaning of Christmas is unclear, but it’s fun watching the tale unfold.
The romantic interest is provided by Sara’s brother Dave Gabriel (John Brotherton) and Steve Larkin puts in a wonderful portrayal of Santa.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS 1991
Ethan (Ethan Embry), is the practical older brother, and adorable Hallie (Thora Birch) knows how to charm her way out any given situation, and they are both intent on spending Christmas with their parents, Catherine (Harley Jane Kozak) and Michael (Jamey Sheridan), and grandmother, Lillian (Lauren Bacall).
Despite the fact that their parents are divorced and Catherine is about to marry Tony Boer (Kevin Nealon)
So when Hallie goes to visit Santa Claus, she asks for the unusual gift of getting her parents back together.
Ethan and Hallie embark on their adventure and almost nothing goes exactly as planned partly because Ethan is preoccupied not only with his parents' romantic dilemma but also his first teenage crush, Stephanie (Amy Oberer).
This Christmas comedy is a hilarious caper to ensure everyone lives happily ever after scheme to get what they most want for Christmas.
So in the end does Catherine decide to reject Tony and remarry Michael or do the children fail.
Watch it and see.
THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIES EVER – THIS CHRISTMAS
This Christmas, is a holiday drama centred on the Whitfield family's first Christmas together in four years.
In Los Angeles, Shirley Ann Whitfield (Loretta Devine), affectionately known as Ma'Dere, is the matriarch of the Whitfield family.
Her six children are scattered far and wide, wife and mother Lisa (Regina King) lives in San Francisco and feels the need to take on the responsibility to manage her extended family's welfare.
Traveling jazz musician Quentin Jr (Idris Elba), who has been absent from the family for four years, and Claude (Columbus Short) is a marine.
In New York ad exec Kelli and (Sharon Leal) is the self-confessed selfish one, Mel (Lauren London) is a college student and Michael (Chris Brown) still lives at home while figuring out what he wants to do with his life.
Ma'Dere has lived in the family home for a few years now with Joe Black (Delroy Lindo), a church deacon, with Ma'Dere's husband/the children's father, Quentin Whitfield Sr., long having left the family to pursue a life as a jazz musician.
Each person present in Ma'Dere's house at Christmas is dealing with an issue in his/her life, some known by the family and some not but they all have an effect on the family dynamic associated with how “This Christmas” will turn out for them as a collective family.
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